Draft Thesis Statement
It can be argued that an author's thesis is the most important part of his or her piece of writing. Below are a few sample theses which I could use in my rhetorical analysis.
- In her article, "Genetically Engineered Babies? Experts Debate Idea Of 'Designer Baby' Ban", Wynne Parry uses concrete facts and references to credible sources in order to connect with readers. The concrete facts and references to credible sources increase likelihood of audience support for genetic engineering, a notion which Parry is aiming for.
- I think that this thesis works well at intertwining description of multiple types of appeals but I also think it could use development of word choice, grammar and meaning. I think this helps me have an understanding of what the paper will be about because this thesis works as a sort of outline.
- Wynne Parry's article "Genetically Engineered Babies? Experts Debate Idea Of 'Designer Baby' Ban" works to encourage readers to understand why genetic engineering should be legal. By employing tactics such as direct quotes from credible sources and statistical facts Parry effectively convinces the audience of the claims she makes.
- This thesis is a bit more wordy than the first thesis which I wrote but I still think it gets the point across. I think this thesis could be worked on in terms of making it less wordy and ensuring that the main message is conveyed to the reader. From here I think I understand the main points of the rest of my writing but I think I will just have to analyze more in depth.
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| Koslowski, Roger. "Typeface-thesis" 12/06 via Wikimedia Commons. Creative Commons Attribution |
Reflection:
I read Zayla's thesis blog post as well as Austin's thesis blog post. All of the theses I read seemed to have pretty solid ideas and made me realize that I think mine could be made stronger by using different word choice. I feel like their theses go more in depth which is something I could work on with mine. All of the theses I read were pretty good some could just use some rewording and grammatical changes. Additionally, I think it is good to specify the author and or the article in the thesis to allow the reader to have a better understanding.
I read Zayla's thesis blog post as well as Austin's thesis blog post. All of the theses I read seemed to have pretty solid ideas and made me realize that I think mine could be made stronger by using different word choice. I feel like their theses go more in depth which is something I could work on with mine. All of the theses I read were pretty good some could just use some rewording and grammatical changes. Additionally, I think it is good to specify the author and or the article in the thesis to allow the reader to have a better understanding.
I think that your second thesis is your stronger one. I think just overall the wording is better and it flows easier. However I do think you could make it stronger with more connotative words. However I think yours does a very good job of being straightforward and to the point, which is something I could work on in my own thesis statement.
ReplyDeleteI think you did a very good job of managing to communicate all your ideas in one thesis. This is going to be the challenge for most of us, and doing this in a concise and complete manner is a process. For the most part I think you're off to a very good start, and I think your first thesis is a very solid start to work with.
ReplyDeleteI agree with Bailey that the second thesis is the much stronger one as it just makes more sense to read. It is very easy to understand and I know exactly what you're going to be talking about. It's a very soid start.
ReplyDelete